On Husbands

As I said before, my husband’s awesome. But, let’s rewind to the beginning here for a minute so that I can hopefully make some other new mom breathe a sigh of relief that she is not the only one feeling so much resentment, followed by guilt for feeling that resentment, toward the love of her life.

It is beyond frustrating that my husband didn’t hear our baby cry in the middle of the night. The first days, weeks, and months even there were times when I just wanted to slap my husband across the face or throw the pillow on his face! I was so angry with him. How could he possibly sleep through C’s cries in the middle of the night?! Now, in his defense, I did wake him up numerous times to help me when I needed it and he got up without complaint and happily (?) did what I asked of him. But he’d go right back to sleep the second his head hit the pillow again. At some point I just gave up on asking him to wake up to help because honestly, what could he do to help me breastfeed, hold my boob for me? No, so let him sleep I decided.

But that doesn’t mean I was happy about it. My goodness I never thought I would be so jealous of how much someone slept! It just wasn’t fair, I felt. How could he lay beside me in bed, peacefully dreaming, snoring louder than a bear and sleep the night away, then the next evening say he was tired?! It’s not like he spent an entire day working (manual labor mind you) and then came home to a messy house, snappy wife, cranky baby, needy dog and inconsiderate cat. He works hard and he does so much at home too, so I guess you just deal with it and let him sleep! Secretly, I enjoy the fact that while he’s sleeping, I’m bonding with our baby! Those are moments that only she and I share, no one else, it’s just us girls cuddling, sharing late night secrets and lots of love.

On this note – how do moms do it when they don’t have a supportive husband??  Because my husband is ah-mazing and I can barely keep it together. Not to mention all of the generations before us of moms and wives whose husbands were expected to NOT be around and to NOT help with the children and housekeeping duties. HOW did they do it? I am so thankful to have my husband and to live in a time when raising a family is a team effort! Dads are awesome. Dads are needed. I can’t imagine my life without my dad and its obvious to me and those who know me the mark my dad has on my life and my personality. I am so glad that my daughter has an amazing dad. She has a fun life ahead of her with her Dad.