Dear Charlotte,

You are six months old. How did that happen? Where has the time gone? For your half birthday, I want to say thank you. Thank you for making me a Mom, for teaching me what true, unconditional, all encompassing love is. Thank you for reminding me how much I love your Dad. Thank you for learning with me on my journey of motherhood, for teaching me patience and humility. Thank you for reminding me so many things, like how awesome it is to be naked and to dance and to laugh with your whole body. Thank you for reminding me that I should look in the mirror and see how beautiful I am, and thank you  for so many other things.

These first few months have been a doozy for both of us. We've both grown and learned so much together. I expect that we will be teaching each other every day for the rest of our lives.

Recently, my dear friend shared with me a list of "things to teach your daughter" that she found online. That inspired me to create a list for my children of a few things I hope I will be able to teach them as they grow:

1. You "do" you - You decide who you are, no one else does. Don't compare yourself to others - every single person is different and they should be! That's what makes us all so beautiful.  Do what makes you happy. Don't concern yourself with what others are doing.




















2. Always try your best -  No matter what it is you are doing, the only thing I ask of you is for you to try your best. If you try your best at everything you do you can always be proud of the outcome.



3. Don't underestimate yourself - You are stronger, smarter, braver than you think.

 


4. Actions speak louder than words.




5.  If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. Think before you speak, and remember that everyone has their own story and is on their own journey...you never know what someone is going through.  Judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who you are.





6.  Don't be too hard on yourself. - If you're anything like me, you're your own worst critic. Don't be so hard on yourself. You are enough. In fact, you are everything to your Father and me.




7.  Be Gracious. Remember, there is always, always, always, always something to be thankful for.



8. Pray. Pray every day. Whenever you feel like it.






9.  Dance your heart out and sing at the top of your lungs. - Music is therapeutic. Find what music it is you like and play it loud and proud - sing as loud as you want and bust a move.




10. Everything is always okay in the end.  If it’s not okay, then it’s not the end.

Celebrating 6 Months!

Our sweet little Charlotte will be six months old this weekend. It truly feels like we just brought her home yesterday! These last six months we have all grown so much. Everything is completely different than it used to be, and it's awesome. We have some serious milestones to celebrate at six months!

Just look at that tiny baby. So perfect. We had no clue what we were doing. Let's be real for a second - the first few months were terrible. The beginning is hard. I didn't understand why my friends never told me how horrible it is - but now that we're getting the hang of things, I get it. You forget. You forget how hard the transition is because it's all so worth it, and it gets easier.

We don't have it all figured out yet, I don't think we ever will, but we're not scared out of our minds all the time anymore either. Charlotte has been sleeping in our bed for about a month now, which I'm not proud of, but hey, everyone sleeps better that way so why not? We'll get her back in her crib soon, hopefully. We hit a little speed bump when we started eating foods but we got over it and now she LOVES eating. Peaches are her favorite right now! And I will be the first to say that breastfeeding/pumping at work has been a challenge for me, but we made it to 6 months and I am very proud!

Charlotte was born at 6 lbs. 7 oz and as of March 19th she weighed in at 13 lbs. 11 oz. so we have successfully doubled her birth weight! She is sitting up by her self, and she's got a little hop-crawl going right now so I am pretty sure that she will be crawling in no time, maybe this weekend! She doesn't have any teeth yet but she's a big fan of chewing on everything. Her favorite toy is the little pink baby giraffe teether that we've named Raffe(think miniature Sophie the Giraffe). Her favorite book is I Love You All the Same. She hated her pacifier for the first 4 and a half months of her life but now loves it. She's started giving snuggles, hugs, and sometimes kisses. She particularly likes to kiss her dog, Marlie, and would really love it if her cat, Zeke, would let her touch him - I think he will give in eventually. Her most favorite things are being naked and bath time. We still can't tell what color her eyes are yet - we're thinking they might end up hazel. They're definitely not blue, but they're not quite brown or green yet either. She's got some beautiful blond hair on the top of her head that she really enjoys letting Daddy brush before bedtime. She adores her Daddy and loves dancing with him and riding on his shoulders and for some unknown reason, she loves it when I sing to her. She is the light of our lives and we feel so blessed to be her parents.

Our little snuggle bunny.

Packing for Baby

I guess I have always been an "over-packer." I think most girls over pack for trips, but considering how fickle I am - just ask my husband - he'll tell you I have a special knack for packing twice as many things as I actually need for trips...Just in Case.... Even if it's just an overnight trip or even a day trip! Throw in a baby and goodness they just don't make trunks big enough for our luggage! So I'm working on it! As Charlotte gets older it gets easier too, our first trip with her we packed EVERYTHING! Talk about planning for the worst - we had no clue what we would need so we brought it all. As time goes on we're getting more efficient, but, babies still need a lot of stuff. So here's my packing list for traveling with baby:

Am I missing anything?

What's on the Menu Lately

My husband and I love cooking, and we love cooking together. When we were dating we used to cook meals together all the time. So lately, you know since we became parents, finding the time and the energy to get creative in the kitchen has been a challenge. And I have to admit, we've cheated pretty regularly - family size frozen chicken pot pie - delish! But also super easy to make from scratch so why not make it ourselves?!

Over the years I've gotten in the habit of looking up new recipes on Pinterest instead of perfecting some oldies and sticking them into regular rotation. I've also been searching for what I hope will be my go-to meals, you know the meals your mom regularly made when you were growing up. The meals that my kids are going to remember with fondness and that will be the first meals they learn how to cook on their own.

My mom made some really great food when I was a kid. To this day I still make her Enchiladas, Lasagna, and Egg Rolls (recently resurrected in our kitchen to my husbands sheer delight). But I'm not sure what my  signature meals are....we do a lot of pasta in our house - which I'm trying to cut down on but its just so darn good and easy! And I started working on a chicken and rice casserole that I haven't yet perfected.  When I think about it, we don't eat much red meat - so maybe I should try a few new recipes in that category.

What are your family's go-to meals? Do you have any good suggestions for us?

Weekend Recap

Happy Monday, Friends!

Mondays are rough, always have been, but they seem to be getting harder as I get older. Having our sweet little family together all day for two days is so much fun that when Monday comes and Adam and I have to go back to work and we have to take Charlotte to day care I get pretty sad. The house seems so lonely and work just doesn't seem like fun! But I guess that makes weeknights even better!

So what did we do this weekend, you ask? It feels like we did a lot, but once I start getting it all down it doesn't seem like it!

Friday evening I headed out to pick Charlotte up from "day care" and was pleasantly surprised to hear from my Mom that her and Dad were going to pick up a pizza and come to our house for dinner. AWESOME! We love living close to my parents and try to get as much quality time in with them as we can. Charlotte adores her Gigi and Papa and I'm pretty sure the feeling is mutual so it's a win win all around. The pizza was delish, Charlotte had a blast, I unloaded a lot of clothes on my Mom from my closet and Dad and Adam got in some March Madness tv time. Great night!

Saturday morning we were up far too early so we kind of lazed around until we were awake enough to get up and moving. We headed to the mall and walked around for a bit and did some shopping. 

 Then we came home and enjoyed lunch on our back porch. It was a gorgeous day! Charlotte even got to take her first outdoor nap.
 

 It was a really nice day, even though all my big ideas of spring cleaning the house went right out the window....I'm thinking spending time like this with my daughter is more fun anyway, right?

 

 Sunday morning, we were up bright and early again (I guess my days of sleeping in on the weekends are gone...) and headed up to Gigi and Papa's house. My grandparents were visiting for the day so we headed up early to get as much family time in as possible! We always have a great time hanging out at Gigi and Papas, and this Sunday was no different.

Hope you had a great weekend!

Happy!

 Happy Friday, Happy First Day of Spring!

We have so many things to look forward to this spring! The first being little Miss Charlotte feeling better! We took her to the doctor last night after our super awesome babysitter told us that she was wheezing during the day!  EEK! Scary! Good news is the Dr. checked her out and she is good to go, just congested and she should be pulling through it soon. Major ego boost for Mommy though; Dr. "Do you think she's advanced? She looks pretty advanced to me and I see babies all day every day!" What? Duh, of course my child is advanced, thanks for noticing. Sorry, I just had to share!


Charlotte will be six months old on the 28th! WHERE HAS THE TIME GONE? That's next weekend! Next weekend is also our very dear friends' wedding, FINALLY! (Just kidding, Suzanne!) These two are perfect for each other and we couldn't be happier that they are tying the knot. Adam and I are both in the wedding party and we absolutely cannot wait to celebrate all weekend with our friends! Charlotte will be staying home with her grandparents and we'll miss her, but we're also ready for some baby free fun time!

The days are going to be getting longer, the sun is going to be shining and heating us up, flowers and trees will start blooming...I'm pretty excited for Spring to be here! We are well overdue for family walks each night, our poor dog is definitely ready! We are super excited for baseball season and can't wait to hit up the Salem Red Sox stadium regularly with hopefully a few visits to see the Nats play, too! Charlotte got a fun swing from her Aunt and Uncle for Christmas and we can't wait to hang it up in the back yard and sit outside, push her in the swing, grill up some food and enjoy the outdoors. The Appalachian Trail is calling our names and I know there are a few wineries and breweries that we will be visiting soon. Welcome, Spring, we've been waiting for you!

I hope everyone has a lovely Friday and fun weekend!

Weekend ReCap

This weekend was a fun one! Until Charlotte got sick of course...

Friday evening my Mother in law arrived for a weekend visit on her way up to Northern Virginia to stay with my sister in law while she recovers from ankle surgery. She arrived right at quitting time when Adam was getting home from work as well. So I wrapped up work and we all jumped in the car to go pick up Charlotte from day care. Debbie hasn't seen Charlotte since around Christmas so I know she was really excited to see her! We then went out to dinner at a nice little Italian restaurant - it was delish! We spent the rest of the evening at home relaxing, catching up, and playing. It was nice for Charlotte and her Grammy to be able to spend some quality time together! Charlotte LOVED meeting the dogs and proceeded to give them tons of kisses throughout the night.
 

Saturday morning we had planned on heading to downtown Roanoke for the St. Patrick's Day Parade. (Un)fortunately the weather wasn't looking the best - it was rainy and chilly - and Adam still had a yucky cold he had been fighting all week so we decided to stay in our pj's until noon and hang out at home some more with Grammy! It was a very nice relaxing morning at home. But, eventually we did get ourselves moving and headed over to our friends house for their sons' second birthday party! I still can't believe he's two already! Time just flies when you're having fun right?!

Here's a picture of Charlotte and her friend Jake at his big brother Nathan's birthday party. Charlotte and Jake are about 5 weeks apart in age.

Sunday morning Grammy hit the road for NoVa and we spent the day doing nothing. Gosh, we sound lazy! I feel like the week really takes it out of us that by the time the weekend rolls around we are just exhausted and ready to rest and charge up for the next week. Anyone else feel that way? I never appreciated the weekend more than I do now!

Recently I ordered Charlotte and I matching shirts with our monograms and we wore them for our all day laze fest - I look kind of crazy here - which is probably an accurate portrayal of me - but Charlotte looks super cute - which is a true portrayal of her too!

As we were laying around Sunday binging through last seasons Game of Thrones I noticed Charlotte was extra cuddly, she actually fell asleep sitting up...should have been my first sign that she wasn't feeling well. After her nap she had a full on breakdown and we realized that our sweet little baby has her first cold, and it's so heartbreaking! Gah. Her little coughs and sneezes are so cute and so scary at the same time! She's got so much snot all stuffed up in her little head! I'm sure I'm being an overly worried new mom thinking that she's going to either A. stop breathing entirely while she's sleeping or napping because it's just too hard to breath or B. choke on all the snot running down her throat. I'm insane, I know. A true testament to her personality though is that she has continued to be all smiles - my little ray of sunshine!

So we stayed home sick together on Monday. It was a day full of lots of snuggles, lots of snot, and a few naps....she's starting to feel better but we're not in the clear yet. I hope that it goes away soon! We unfortunately didn't get a very good picture of her in her St. Patrick's Day outfit but here is a cute one of her on the way to the birthday party Saturday.

Over the past week my Grandmother (Charlotte's name sake) has been in and out of the hospital. She's not feeling well and I wish that we lived closer to her so that we could visit and shower her with hugs and love. Please send prayers, friends, for a quick recovery for Grandma! We love her so much!

On Husbands

As I said before, my husband’s awesome. But, let’s rewind to the beginning here for a minute so that I can hopefully make some other new mom breathe a sigh of relief that she is not the only one feeling so much resentment, followed by guilt for feeling that resentment, toward the love of her life.

It is beyond frustrating that my husband didn’t hear our baby cry in the middle of the night. The first days, weeks, and months even there were times when I just wanted to slap my husband across the face or throw the pillow on his face! I was so angry with him. How could he possibly sleep through C’s cries in the middle of the night?! Now, in his defense, I did wake him up numerous times to help me when I needed it and he got up without complaint and happily (?) did what I asked of him. But he’d go right back to sleep the second his head hit the pillow again. At some point I just gave up on asking him to wake up to help because honestly, what could he do to help me breastfeed, hold my boob for me? No, so let him sleep I decided.

But that doesn’t mean I was happy about it. My goodness I never thought I would be so jealous of how much someone slept! It just wasn’t fair, I felt. How could he lay beside me in bed, peacefully dreaming, snoring louder than a bear and sleep the night away, then the next evening say he was tired?! It’s not like he spent an entire day working (manual labor mind you) and then came home to a messy house, snappy wife, cranky baby, needy dog and inconsiderate cat. He works hard and he does so much at home too, so I guess you just deal with it and let him sleep! Secretly, I enjoy the fact that while he’s sleeping, I’m bonding with our baby! Those are moments that only she and I share, no one else, it’s just us girls cuddling, sharing late night secrets and lots of love.

On this note – how do moms do it when they don’t have a supportive husband??  Because my husband is ah-mazing and I can barely keep it together. Not to mention all of the generations before us of moms and wives whose husbands were expected to NOT be around and to NOT help with the children and housekeeping duties. HOW did they do it? I am so thankful to have my husband and to live in a time when raising a family is a team effort! Dads are awesome. Dads are needed. I can’t imagine my life without my dad and its obvious to me and those who know me the mark my dad has on my life and my personality. I am so glad that my daughter has an amazing dad. She has a fun life ahead of her with her Dad.

On Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is a challenge. I should have written this back when we were learning because every single day was hard back then – actually it still is now – just not quite as hard. But, the key word here, I think, is LEARNING. Breastfeeding is a learning process, just like parenting. Just because you have the equipment does not mean you know how to use it, much less properly!

My Tips for new moms on breastfeeding:

• Use the nipple cream. I know it hurts at first, but the pain does go away, I promise!
• Drink lots of water
• Don’t forget to feed yourself – I usually prepped something for myself to eat while I was nursing – it’s hard to find time to eat so use your time wisely! 
•  Mothers Milk Tea is awesome 
•  Lactation cookies work too 
•  Speak to a lactation consultant at the hospital and once you get home too if you have questions 
•  Don’t be afraid to ask questions

How to feed – at the beginning I fed my daughter on both breasts during each feeding, burping in the middle. Now that she’s more efficient, I feed her on one at a time, and then just switch at the next feeding session. One tip that a friend told me was that the first breast is the “meal”, and if they are still hungry offer the second as “dessert.” It is very important to make sure that you are emptying your breast when they eat for a number of reasons – 1. The “hind” milk or the milk at the bottom of the barrel has all the fatty goodness for baby and 2. You don’t want clogged ducts, etc. One suggestion or method that I know works for a lot is to pump after each feeding – this is especially helpful to increase your milk supply and to get the hind milk for your baby to eat if you are worried about how much your baby is getting or if she is gaining enough weight.

One of the hardest things for me at the beginning was knowing if she was getting enough milk. If I could go back in time I would tell my new-mom self not to worry about that. Let her eat as long as she wants to, when she wants to: that’s how you know she’s getting enough. Eventually, they will learn how to suck more efficiently and you won’t be stuck on the couch for half an hour or more! Every hour or two; you may still feel like a nursing cow because you’re going to be either nursing or pumping for a while – but it gets easier. Also, you won’t need that baby app forever. At the beginning, it was a life saver – being able to track feedings, diapers, naps, etc. but after a while, you will have a semblance of a memory and won’t need to feed every hour or two so you won’t be logging forever!

Babies get gas. Burping is great, you should burp your baby often – take a break during feedings to burp them and definitely burp when you’re done. Another thing that I didn’t think of as a new mom were gas drops. Sometimes what you eat upsets their stomach and they get gas that doesn’t come out with a burp – it just hurts their little tummies. This happened frequently when she was very little and gas drops are magical. Get some gas drops. 

How long will you breastfeed? Before I had my daughter, I had grand ideas of the type of mom i was going to be…if you haven’t noticed I haven’t lived up to my own expectations! One thing I thought would be so easy was breastfeeding and I would obviously breastfeed until she was at least 1. Well, let me tell you, in the beginning, just getting through one day was an accomplishment. My advice, take it one day at a time. Set small goals for yourself. If it’s to make it to the end of the day, great, make it to the end of the day and then try again tomorrow, if you want! If it’s to make it to six weeks, great, make it then set a new goal. Right now, we’re at 5 months and doing pretty well – my goal is to get to six months and then readdress and see if I want to keep going. 

I will tell you that now that we know how to do it, it is very nice to be able to feed her whenever and wherever if she needs it. If we were on formula and out and about and I forgot to pack enough or we ran out and were out longer than we planned I would be out of luck, but with breastfeeding, we’ve always got what we need in an emergency. 

The best advice I ever got about breastfeeding came from my best friend’s sister. As an experienced Mom of two I really value her opinions and she is always completely honest about things. She said “I hated breastfeeding at first. I thought it was supposed to be this loving, bonding relationship where we look into each others eyes and smile blah blah blah. Then I felt like I dreaded every feeding and resented the fact that I was the one stuck feeding him constantly. I wanted to smother my husband with a pillow when he was snoozing away when I was up for the 9^th time in 8 hours.” She also said: “Don’t quit on a bad day. You don’t want your last memories of breastfeeding to be negative – so if you want to quit, wait until you have a great day of breastfeeding then stop. But, also know that if you switch to formula that you’re still #1 mom! Do whatever works. (Her oldest son) was formula fed and he’s like 90% normal.” Ha! See how honest and funny she is. I am so grateful to her for those words of advice in the early days. Her tips were so helpful and the camaraderie she provided was priceless.

What is "Normal" Anyway?

Now that Charlotte is 5 months old I feel there there’s this silent expectation that I’ve got everything figured out now. Well, that’s not the case, in the slightest. I do feel more comfortable with taking care of her, I feel like I know her well enough to know her needs and wants and we are sort of getting into a schedule. My OCDness is driving me really hard to set up and stick to a schedule for the whole day – but I think that’s just annoying to my husband because let’s face it – it never works out that way, something always happens to throw us off course.

I thought that by this point I would be so far back into the swing of “normal” life and because I’m not I feel like I’ve failed somehow. But maybe what I need to come to terms with is that our “normal” isn’t the norm anymore. I asked for this new life; I wanted it for so long and I was blessed with an amazing daughter and a beautiful family. I need to remind myself of that fact every time I feel a little selfish and start to miss my old freedoms. Time to start living this new normal before it becomes old again. That's something else I'm learning - with children life is always changing, once you think you have things figured out, it's time for a change...